Finally

I tried so hard to continue my daily routine of writing, had collected ideas too but dont know what happened when. But finally I am going to write something today.
It is such an asshole feeling which totally goes to ur nerves...I had opted to this film industry just out of my fun and maybe others recognising me. The trick of getting others attention is to do something which noone does or atleast rare one does. I also did this, got attention and finally enjoyed it too and might have done some cool stupid things, which led me to finding room on this short notice. The huge amount of sun in such few days though whatever days would have been I had to ask from some friends, so earlier the better. Though time factor gives me chance to juggle this idea that from whom and how much but a lot of headache too. In life I always tried other things just for sake of avoiding headaches. Anyways I was collecting money but their seemed to be no hope and thsi hopelessness stung me so deep that ground seemed so near from 3rd floor but I was in not such hurry to touch it. Finally phone call from a friend came and Voilly I got money. Hope once again leaping high and everything seemed fine.
Though in this whole story this rise and fall of hope was not the main theme. I called myself asshole for misbehaving my roommates and at other time I was planning to torture him sometime. This whole rage was boiling inside me or still boiling inside me. This jump from one cool and composed being to furious and violent me brought my pathetic self outside. I felt so helpless or maybe I was helpless thats why changing grounds to reduce burn of my ass.

Wholistic but step by step
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Most of the time in my life I had been thinking or looking at things in wholictic point of view. This made things so unclear. Its form seemed so big to me . Now when I really knew what is film editing then I realised that editing is most crucial part of life. It joins whole and creates concept of whole. Though editing is mostly used in movies but if we look at process of editing then it was always with us. This made life interesting. Now I know if I have to do something then I will start from somewhere and try to make my way with small pieces, someday I will get not real but something of real.

Improvisation
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Whenever I worked with people I usually failed because they always failed. This thing tormented very badly to me. After a while I really got scared of this. NOw when I am working I found that when I failed or fail to dictate somebody to do something then I should usually not tell everything to him just part by part to them. I should command to them not leave them on their own to improvise, then what is the use of yours.

Maturity Vs Imaturity
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Whenever we use above words then we usually mean how much that guy is adaptive to situation. How many dificult situation he can handle.